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Saison 4 Episode 61
Concurrence loyale Fade in to Sarge talking to people Sarge : en : Alright men. Donut. Since Simmons has been demoted for reasons of dementia- fr : Simmons : en : The tank was real! fr : Sarge : en : And he's been ordered by the Judge to stay at least two hundred yards away from us- fr : Simmons : en : Oh come on, that wasn't a real Judge, that was Donut wearing a powdered wig! fr : Donut : en : Over- huhem, ahuhh, (in a deeper voice now) overruled. Shame on you. Hurr. fr : Sarge : en : We are now holding auditions for the permanent position of Second in Command, here at Blood Gulch Outpost Number One. fr : Simmons : en : WHAT!? fr : Sarge : en : And since Simmons is disqualified because of the afore mentioned cookooness, and since Grif is ineligible- fr : Grif : en : Or because I don't wanna compete? fr : Sarge : en : Because you're ineligible! fr : Grif : en : No, I just don't want to compete. fr : Sarge : en : Of course you don't, because you're ineligible! fr : Grif : en : (sigh) Whatever. fr : Donut : en : I guess that means I get the job, because I'm unopposed, which is the same way I got "Most Likely to be Fabulous" in high school. fr : Sarge : en : Actually Donut, I managed to find some other candidates for you to compete against. fr : Donut : en : Huh? fr : Sarge : en : We've located an old wrench used by Lopez, and this skull of unknown origin. Some dirt and a rock entered the preliminaries but they didn't make it to the semifinals. Lazy bastards. fr : Donut : en : Hyes. You guys are goin' down. In yo face wrench, in yo face! Take that, bonehead, ha ha ha, woo! fr : Sarge : en : You will be competing against each other in a series of gruelling events, in order to gain my attention. First up, the obstacle course, Grif! Get the alligators! fr : Grif : en : I thought I was ineligible. fr : Sarge : en : To earn my respect, dirtbag. You're still perfectly capable of grunt work. fr : Simmons : en : Oh man, I can't believe this. My life was going exactly as planned. I was second in command of a marginally successful unit, I had a superior officer who genuinely cared about me, I had the respect and admiration of all my peers. That was the dream! How did it all go so wrong? How! Hahahahow!? Maybe that stupid tank was just a figment of my imagination. fr : Sheila : en : I don't think so. fr : Simmons : en : Shut up, you ruined my life. Cut to Caboose talking to ...nobody? Caboose : en : I think I will call him Crunchbite. fr : Andy : en : Eh, that's a stupid name. fr : Caboose : en : Uh, well I think it's better than your suggestion. Crouchosaurus? fr : Church : en : Caboose, who're you talkin' to- HOLY SHIT! fr : Alien : en : Blargh! fr : Caboose : en : Stop! He is my friend. fr : Alien : en : Blargharg. fr : Caboose : en : He is not going to eat anybody. fr : Andy : en : Yeah, he thinks you guys stink too much to eat. fr : Alien : en : Blargh. fr : Tex : en : He thinks we stink? fr : Alien : en : Blargh blargh. fr : Tex : en : It smells like someone set a fish on fire in here. fr : Alien : en : Largh? fr : Church : en : Caboose, what the fuck man, are you sure about this thing? fr : Caboose : en : Absolutely, he has not tried to bite me, at all. fr : Alien : en : Hnnk! fr : Caboose : en : Since he bit me the first time. fr : Andy : en : Heheh yeah, that was hilarious. fr : Caboose : en : I think I might need a tetanus shot. fr : Alien : en : Blargh blargh, largh hnnk blargh. fr : Church : en : Whoa, that thing's breath smells like infected cheese on a hotplate. (cough) Tucker starts coming down the ramp Alien : en : Largh, blargh! fr : Andy : en : I don't think he liked that. fr : Tucker : en : Whoa, man, what is that stench? fr : Alien : en : Hargh. fr : Tucker : en : Is a skunk juggling dead hamsters in here? fr : Alien : en : Largh. fr : Tucker : en : It smells like old yogurt. fr : Alien : en : Largh, whargh, wharharhrgh. fr : Tucker : en : Did you eat and then throw up a can of trash? fr : Alien : en : Hnnk! fr : Caboose : en : That's exactly what he said right before he bit me. fr : Alien : en : Largher, hnnk! Hrarhrh. fr : Tex : en : You understand what he's saying? fr : Alien : en : Largh... (etc, just kinda keeps going in the background) fr : Church : en : Whey hey wait, I think I'm hearing a pattern here. I think that blarghs come after honks. Or, vice versa. fr : Caboose : en : I think, I think blargh means, me, or, apples. Guys, Apples must be the name of his cat! Quick, quick, is- is Apples stuck in a tree? I will call the fire department. fr : Church : en : Mister Huge Alien, do you understand what we are saying? fr : Alien : en : Wharrrgh! fr : Church : en : I have no idea if that means yes or no. fr : Caboose : en : Totally blows away your vica versa theory. Sorry. fr : Tucker : en : You two are retarded. You're not gonna be able to figure out alien language by experimentation, give it up. fr : Church : en : You don't know that! fr : Tucker : en : You don't even know how they talk. What if their language isn't entirely verbal? It could be part telepathic, or via smells. Whoh. fr : Church : en : Well if it's via smells then you should be fluent in the language already. Jackass. fr : Alien : en : Hnnk! fr : Church : en : Oh shut up, you're not helping. fr : Caboose : en : Wait! I think Tucker might be right. I think he might be saying things telepathically. I just heard something in my head! fr : Church : en : What? What was it? fr : Caboose : en : It was a voice, saying, "Blargh blargh blargh honk." fr : Church : en : That wasn't in your head Caboose, he just said that. You're just so dumb you're lagged a few seconds behind us. By the time your brain figures out what it's heard, it feels like it's already happened. fr : Caboose : en : ... fr : Alien : en : ... fr : Caboose : en : ... That's not true. Wait! I hear something else in my head! It must be Apples, trying to communicate with me! Quick, Tucker, get a ladder! (Alien continues blarging) Revenir à la page de la saison.